Thursday, July 30, 2009
Sunday, July 01, 2007
Franchise, Anyone?
My fave ice cream parlor currently is Awfully Chocolate and recently I learnt from their website that they had expanded their franchise to Shanghai and Jarkata somemore!
$$
I remembered reading somewhere that the dudes who run Awfully Chocolate are lawyers by training!
And what are we doctors doing????? Surely we can start our own desert parlor???
Some suggestions:
1) Malignant Mango (this one got alliteration wor!)
2) Necrotic Banana
3) And if we really really want to do cocoa as well, how about:
COLONIC CHOCOLATE??
Franchise anyone??
$$
I remembered reading somewhere that the dudes who run Awfully Chocolate are lawyers by training!
And what are we doctors doing????? Surely we can start our own desert parlor???
Some suggestions:
1) Malignant Mango (this one got alliteration wor!)
2) Necrotic Banana
3) And if we really really want to do cocoa as well, how about:
COLONIC CHOCOLATE??
Franchise anyone??
Thursday, June 14, 2007
Sunday, November 13, 2005
To Quit or Not to Quit?
1st I will like to say that I am as frustrated as many of my readers. But unfortunately due to the turn of events I no longer feel blogging is fun.
So officially, you can take it that this blog is closed. I will leave whatever articles I can in the archives. Occasionally I might still post something since this blog is one of the way I communicate with certain people.
In July, blogging was the fad. Things have changed. How many of those sacrificed during the Salem Witch Hunt were really witches?
I would say none.
Ciao!
So officially, you can take it that this blog is closed. I will leave whatever articles I can in the archives. Occasionally I might still post something since this blog is one of the way I communicate with certain people.
In July, blogging was the fad. Things have changed. How many of those sacrificed during the Salem Witch Hunt were really witches?
I would say none.
Ciao!
Saturday, November 12, 2005
Thunderstorm
Kah Leong was awakened by the sounds of thunder. He half-opened his groggy eyes and could see flashes of light from the window slit. The usual monsoon thunderstorm..... Expectedly, he heard footsteps scuffling. Ma always came into his room to close the windows when it rained.
Kah Leong called out, "Ma...?"
"Wake up bro, stop dreaming!" Someone shook him in the darkness.
Kah Leong realised he was not at home. He was not in his pajamas. He was in his long four and his boots were still on. He was at the battlefield.
Kah Leong hated his life when he was a full time national serviceman. What was the point? He liked to give the excuse that he was peace loving. The rifle was too heavy for him. War was never a possibility.
Overnight, things changed. The home that he knew was reduced to rubbles in a matter of minutes. He was spared as he was working in the business district. Perharps the enemy had only bombarded residential areas to instill fear. Perharps they had wanted to preserve the business infrastructure.
Kah Leong's family was not so fortunate. After the bombardment, he went to what was left of his terrace house. He searched frantically for his loved ones. There were bits and pieces of human flesh everywhere. He saw a detached arm and recognised it to be his sister's. After hesistating for a minute, he found a clothe and wrapped the arm in it. He could find noting else.
Kah Leong's legs were weak and he could no longer stand. He kneeled down crying, hugging his sister's remains. Where was Ma? Could she had gone out and was seeking refuge somewhere? But Ma never went out much...... How could this have happened? War was so far away......
The millitary police found him a few days later still ramaging through the ruins. They brought him back to his reservist unit.
Kah Leong was a peace loving man. Now he is filled with anger and hatred. Now he wanted to carry arms. To fight. To seek revenge. To take back the land which belonged to him and his people.
It was not a thunderstorm.
Kah Leong called out, "Ma...?"
"Wake up bro, stop dreaming!" Someone shook him in the darkness.
Kah Leong realised he was not at home. He was not in his pajamas. He was in his long four and his boots were still on. He was at the battlefield.
-----------------------
Kah Leong hated his life when he was a full time national serviceman. What was the point? He liked to give the excuse that he was peace loving. The rifle was too heavy for him. War was never a possibility.
Overnight, things changed. The home that he knew was reduced to rubbles in a matter of minutes. He was spared as he was working in the business district. Perharps the enemy had only bombarded residential areas to instill fear. Perharps they had wanted to preserve the business infrastructure.
Kah Leong's family was not so fortunate. After the bombardment, he went to what was left of his terrace house. He searched frantically for his loved ones. There were bits and pieces of human flesh everywhere. He saw a detached arm and recognised it to be his sister's. After hesistating for a minute, he found a clothe and wrapped the arm in it. He could find noting else.
Kah Leong's legs were weak and he could no longer stand. He kneeled down crying, hugging his sister's remains. Where was Ma? Could she had gone out and was seeking refuge somewhere? But Ma never went out much...... How could this have happened? War was so far away......
The millitary police found him a few days later still ramaging through the ruins. They brought him back to his reservist unit.
Kah Leong was a peace loving man. Now he is filled with anger and hatred. Now he wanted to carry arms. To fight. To seek revenge. To take back the land which belonged to him and his people.
------------------------
Kah Leong wiped away his tears and picked up his M16. Somehow, he could no longer feel the weight of his rifle. He followed his platoonmates out of the tentage. They were under enemy artillery bombardment.It was not a thunderstorm.
Wednesday, November 09, 2005
Why They So Like Dat?
Last week got many holidays, so Dr Og managed to steal some time off and go out with friends.
We were at a HiFi exhibition when my friend made unsubstantiated statement no. 1:
"They say this HiFi set sibei solid."
When I probed further about who they were, he could not tell me and this lead to unsubstantiated statement no. 2:
"I read about it from somewhere"
Of course anal retentive me cannot let it just go down like that so I asked where was this somewhere? This did not lead to anymore statements. My friend got angry with me and left.
How often it is that we hear people telling us that "they tell us this treatment good" or "read somewhere that this was useful". How often it is that people get angry when we tell them not to trust they.
The big question is really how can we become they and spread some correct messages for once.
Who are this people making irresponsible, unsubstantiated and evidenceless remarks?
And why they so like dat?
We were at a HiFi exhibition when my friend made unsubstantiated statement no. 1:
"They say this HiFi set sibei solid."
When I probed further about who they were, he could not tell me and this lead to unsubstantiated statement no. 2:
"I read about it from somewhere"
Of course anal retentive me cannot let it just go down like that so I asked where was this somewhere? This did not lead to anymore statements. My friend got angry with me and left.
How often it is that we hear people telling us that "they tell us this treatment good" or "read somewhere that this was useful". How often it is that people get angry when we tell them not to trust they.
The big question is really how can we become they and spread some correct messages for once.
Who are this people making irresponsible, unsubstantiated and evidenceless remarks?
And why they so like dat?
Friday, November 04, 2005
小明的日记簿 Episode 3:
小明的日记簿 is an epic novel which depicts the ridiculous life of a medical student. The characters of this epic novel are fictional. Any similarities with person(s) dead or alive is purely due to your own imagination
Foreword:
In the last episode of 小明的日记簿, Jassie commented:
"HAHAHA kinda reminds me of harry potter though... tom riddle's diary... "
Just wanna say that my story is on a hairy doctor..... not harry potter!
And there ain't no magic in medicine........
Mao Mao was hairy even as a little boy. He especially hated it when those ugly aunties with their curly hair and acne cratered face came over and pinch him on the cheeks saying "wah boy boy so much hair, soooo cute!" He was worried that they would infect him with the acne germs. Being hairy was bad enough, protect his complexion he must.
Mao Mao would later learn in microbiology classes that the germs he was so afraid of was Propionibacterium acnes, a skin bacteria. For now, Mao Mao was just a freshman not really enjoying his orientation.
He had no idea what the hell they were doing. Apparently it was a float like those in Chingay. As with the tradition of the medical faculty, the theme of the float was some Disney cartoon.
"Wah lau, sibei embarrassing...." Mao Mao thought. The other faculties were making cool stuff like dragon with coke cans or some post modern structures. "Disney cartoon..... sigh....."
At least tonight was the last night of orientation. But tonight they can't go home. The float had to be perfect! They were making the final touches for the judging tomorrow morning. Just as Mao Mao was relaxing one corner, Meng Kee appeared all excited. "Heh we've got allocated a good job tonight!"
Before Mao Mao could protest they were driven by a year two senior in his BMW 5 series to the carpark where the float presentation would take place the next day. A pretty fresh(wo)man in supermini mini skirt was in the front seat. The castle part of the float had already been transported to the carpark.
"Ok dudes get off here, you guys jagar the castle. be careful the law people come and vandalise!" The senior than drove off with the pretty fresh(wo)man and the mini skirt become more and more mini as they disappeared into the night.
"Wah lau, drive us here also need to have female escort meh?" Mao Mao complained. Plus he had heard from his friend in law fac that they were going to boycott the entire float thingie since they lost every year anyway. They were probably getting drank in someone's hostel room tonight. "Jagar simi? Think I security guard......"
Meng Kee took out a green groundsheet from his bag and laid it on the floor. "Good mah, volunteer and get in the good books of the seniors! Somemore here no need to do anything, can sleep!" He proceeded to lie down to snooze.
Before Mao Mao even sat down on the ground sheet, Meng Kee was already snoring away. Mao Mao felt itchy all over. Being hairy, he trapped plenty of heat and those damned insects had a hard time flying out of the hairy maze in his legs once they flew in.
Mao Mao was looking for some cream in his bag when he saw that diary again. He had forgotten all about it after dumping it in his bag that day.
He had the whole night ahead of him, this could prove interesting......
He flipped to page one, "这是小明的日记簿。生人勿进!”
Then he turned the page,
Foreword:
In the last episode of 小明的日记簿, Jassie commented:
"HAHAHA kinda reminds me of harry potter though... tom riddle's diary... "
Just wanna say that my story is on a hairy doctor..... not harry potter!
And there ain't no magic in medicine........
Mao Mao was hairy even as a little boy. He especially hated it when those ugly aunties with their curly hair and acne cratered face came over and pinch him on the cheeks saying "wah boy boy so much hair, soooo cute!" He was worried that they would infect him with the acne germs. Being hairy was bad enough, protect his complexion he must.
Mao Mao would later learn in microbiology classes that the germs he was so afraid of was Propionibacterium acnes, a skin bacteria. For now, Mao Mao was just a freshman not really enjoying his orientation.
He had no idea what the hell they were doing. Apparently it was a float like those in Chingay. As with the tradition of the medical faculty, the theme of the float was some Disney cartoon.
"Wah lau, sibei embarrassing...." Mao Mao thought. The other faculties were making cool stuff like dragon with coke cans or some post modern structures. "Disney cartoon..... sigh....."
At least tonight was the last night of orientation. But tonight they can't go home. The float had to be perfect! They were making the final touches for the judging tomorrow morning. Just as Mao Mao was relaxing one corner, Meng Kee appeared all excited. "Heh we've got allocated a good job tonight!"
Before Mao Mao could protest they were driven by a year two senior in his BMW 5 series to the carpark where the float presentation would take place the next day. A pretty fresh(wo)man in supermini mini skirt was in the front seat. The castle part of the float had already been transported to the carpark.
"Ok dudes get off here, you guys jagar the castle. be careful the law people come and vandalise!" The senior than drove off with the pretty fresh(wo)man and the mini skirt become more and more mini as they disappeared into the night.
"Wah lau, drive us here also need to have female escort meh?" Mao Mao complained. Plus he had heard from his friend in law fac that they were going to boycott the entire float thingie since they lost every year anyway. They were probably getting drank in someone's hostel room tonight. "Jagar simi? Think I security guard......"
Meng Kee took out a green groundsheet from his bag and laid it on the floor. "Good mah, volunteer and get in the good books of the seniors! Somemore here no need to do anything, can sleep!" He proceeded to lie down to snooze.
Before Mao Mao even sat down on the ground sheet, Meng Kee was already snoring away. Mao Mao felt itchy all over. Being hairy, he trapped plenty of heat and those damned insects had a hard time flying out of the hairy maze in his legs once they flew in.
Mao Mao was looking for some cream in his bag when he saw that diary again. He had forgotten all about it after dumping it in his bag that day.
He had the whole night ahead of him, this could prove interesting......
He flipped to page one, "这是小明的日记簿。生人勿进!”
Then he turned the page,
" 七月十五，晴天。
为了她，我来到了这个鬼地方。
起初我以为我会放得下。
也许我会想你，
也许我会忘记，
也许已没有也许。
至少进入了医学院，我天天都能看得到她！今天上解剖学讲座，她就坐在我下面！噢！我小明发誓，一定要追到她........"
为了她，我来到了这个鬼地方。
起初我以为我会放得下。
也许我会想你，
也许我会忘记，
也许已没有也许。
至少进入了医学院，我天天都能看得到她！今天上解剖学讲座，她就坐在我下面！噢！我小明发誓，一定要追到她........"
"Wah biang!" Mao Mao thought. "This senior is like some perverted stalker with a penchant for cheesy chinese songs!!"
Before he could read on, he heard a car approaching fast. The car came to a screeching halt right in front of them. The headlights were blaring into his eyes but Mao Mao could make out the silhouette of a girl came out of the car.
"Hi, I'm Julie. I brought you guys supper."
Julie is good. Julie is Mao Mao's favourite brand of biscuits.
Wednesday, November 02, 2005
龍門客棧 Kopi Tiam
When I woke up yesterday morning, I had this feeling that it was going to be a perfect day. Actually I didn't exactly wake up, I was lying in my bed having been up the whole night. My newborn baby gave me a hard time the night before. (Yes! I am the married Dr Og! Hence also the poorer one.....)Since my mother was finally awake, we dumped handed the little one over to her and headed for my favourite kopi tiam for my regular cup of kopi peng.
It was only 7am and most lazy Singaporeans were still sound asleep on this Deepavali morning. The kopi tiam was empty. We took the most convenient seats right in front of the mee pok store. It was the only store opened other than the drink store. Needless to say, we ordered mee pok.
We were carrying on with our mundane (and hence perfect) routine when a man appeared. He was a 50s/Ch/M, tanned and in polo-tees and shorts. Without saying a word, he sat down on our table, next to me, and shouted for a bowl of mee kia tah. I looked around, the rest of the coffeeshop was empty. And he must sit at our table. Asshole!
Before our mee pok was ready, an aunty 40s/Ch/F, came into the coffeeshop with presumably her son, a 15/Ch/M. The aunty in pajamas spoke in English and asked her son to sit at the table in front of the mee pok store while she go order drinks. The duo subsequently sat down, without asking, next to the tanned man who was next to me and my wife.
The table was getting crowded and the atmosphere getting tensed. No one was talking. My wife nudged me to indicate that she wanted to move to another table. I nudged her back. No one was going to spoil my perfect morning! I was staying PUT.
Then the man took out a box from him shorts. He slammed it on the table. It was a packet of cigarettes with a picture of a mouth with rotten teeth uncannily similar to his. I wondered if he was the model for the picture, hmmmm..... He picked up the packet of cigarettes, tossed it slightly and a stick stuck out of the box, beckoning. In one swift motion, he picked the cigarette out of the box with his mouth and lighted it with one of those green coloured 50 cents lighter.
The man has drawn first blood.
I stared at the man with contempt.
He turned away to exhale but the fan blew the smoke back towards the table into my face.
I fanned the smoke away in disgust.
The aunty stared at the man as well and the boy was on cue and let out a few coughs in protest.
The man stared back at me. Our eyes met. (Again this one not my patient. hahaha)
My wife was getting worried. Staring incidents do become fatal. After a while of eye sparing (and staring). The man put out his cigarette. My staring worked!(but my wife insisted later it was because the cigarette finished liao.... Women!) The man gobbled down his mee kia and kopi. He left but not before staring at me one last time. This time I pretended to look away because I realized he was much bigger size than me when he stood up. (Not say I scared lah, but my wife with me can?)
After he left, the mother and child became quite chatty. The mother was reminding his son not to take any cold drinks as he was coughing just now. Then she was teaching her son how to eat properly. "Must chew your food!" "Stop playing with your food." And how he must go home and study after breakfast as 'O' Levels was round the corner.
And in the ultimate show of motherly love, she took out a dental floss and passed it to her son. The boy looked embarrassed and let out a little whine. "What? you want me to do it for you isit?" The mother threatened and started twisting her own dental floss around her two index fingers.
Lo and behold, mother and child were showing off their perfect dentition in front of us. The incisors, the premolars, the molars and even the wisdom too.... eh actually both also din have wisdom teeth...... I don't know what the dentist say to their patients, but whatever they're saying is very effective! (Or dental fees these days are really so ex?)
Seriously, I lost my appetite. Luckily, I already finished my bowl of mee pok.
So much for my perfect morning......
My point? Singaporeans are basically a rude bunch. Ok, we are not as bad as some other Asian countries..... but we are nowhere near being polite and gracious. Which brings me to my real point. The service industry sucks becoz the people providing the lousy services are also the same rude customers recieving it. It amuses me to see our media and press trying so hard to segregate the two.
It was only 7am and most lazy Singaporeans were still sound asleep on this Deepavali morning. The kopi tiam was empty. We took the most convenient seats right in front of the mee pok store. It was the only store opened other than the drink store. Needless to say, we ordered mee pok.
We were carrying on with our mundane (and hence perfect) routine when a man appeared. He was a 50s/Ch/M, tanned and in polo-tees and shorts. Without saying a word, he sat down on our table, next to me, and shouted for a bowl of mee kia tah. I looked around, the rest of the coffeeshop was empty. And he must sit at our table. Asshole!
Before our mee pok was ready, an aunty 40s/Ch/F, came into the coffeeshop with presumably her son, a 15/Ch/M. The aunty in pajamas spoke in English and asked her son to sit at the table in front of the mee pok store while she go order drinks. The duo subsequently sat down, without asking, next to the tanned man who was next to me and my wife.
The table was getting crowded and the atmosphere getting tensed. No one was talking. My wife nudged me to indicate that she wanted to move to another table. I nudged her back. No one was going to spoil my perfect morning! I was staying PUT.
Then the man took out a box from him shorts. He slammed it on the table. It was a packet of cigarettes with a picture of a mouth with rotten teeth uncannily similar to his. I wondered if he was the model for the picture, hmmmm..... He picked up the packet of cigarettes, tossed it slightly and a stick stuck out of the box, beckoning. In one swift motion, he picked the cigarette out of the box with his mouth and lighted it with one of those green coloured 50 cents lighter.
The man has drawn first blood.
I stared at the man with contempt.
He turned away to exhale but the fan blew the smoke back towards the table into my face.
I fanned the smoke away in disgust.
The aunty stared at the man as well and the boy was on cue and let out a few coughs in protest.
The man stared back at me. Our eyes met. (Again this one not my patient. hahaha)
My wife was getting worried. Staring incidents do become fatal. After a while of eye sparing (and staring). The man put out his cigarette. My staring worked!(but my wife insisted later it was because the cigarette finished liao.... Women!) The man gobbled down his mee kia and kopi. He left but not before staring at me one last time. This time I pretended to look away because I realized he was much bigger size than me when he stood up. (Not say I scared lah, but my wife with me can?)
After he left, the mother and child became quite chatty. The mother was reminding his son not to take any cold drinks as he was coughing just now. Then she was teaching her son how to eat properly. "Must chew your food!" "Stop playing with your food." And how he must go home and study after breakfast as 'O' Levels was round the corner.
And in the ultimate show of motherly love, she took out a dental floss and passed it to her son. The boy looked embarrassed and let out a little whine. "What? you want me to do it for you isit?" The mother threatened and started twisting her own dental floss around her two index fingers.
Lo and behold, mother and child were showing off their perfect dentition in front of us. The incisors, the premolars, the molars and even the wisdom too.... eh actually both also din have wisdom teeth...... I don't know what the dentist say to their patients, but whatever they're saying is very effective! (Or dental fees these days are really so ex?)
Seriously, I lost my appetite. Luckily, I already finished my bowl of mee pok.
So much for my perfect morning......
--------------------------------------
My point? Singaporeans are basically a rude bunch. Ok, we are not as bad as some other Asian countries..... but we are nowhere near being polite and gracious. Which brings me to my real point. The service industry sucks becoz the people providing the lousy services are also the same rude customers recieving it. It amuses me to see our media and press trying so hard to segregate the two.
Monday, October 31, 2005
Some really heavy stuff.....
Ever so often as a kiasu student, we buy the thickest and most comprehensive book out there. After paying hundreds of dollars we realize, !Shit! cannot finish studying, so we settle for the smaller "Mama" versions. And then you find out in horror you can't remember EVERYTHING in the "Mamas" and its too heavy to read in the toilet.
Finally, you end up buying those little handbooks....the "Babies" hoping that there is enough information in it to help you pass. (If you haven't figured it out, the big ones are called "Papas". NO! NOT Daddies! That sounds really kinky!)
Here are some of thoseDaddies "Papas" that I can never (ever) finish reading:
Harrison's Principles of Internal Medicine
Dimensions: 11.1 x 8.8 x 3.1 inches
Weight: 8.9 pounds
2629 pages!!! I never even bought this book coz it was too big to carry home in a bus! (Poor medical student was I.....)
Bailey & Love's Short Practice of Surgery
Dimensions: 11.0 x 9.0 x 2.8 inches
Weight: 10.2 pounds
1348 pages!!!! (and its a short practice???.... DOH!)
Robbins Pathologic Basis of Disease
Dimensions: 11.3 x 8.7 x 2.4 inches
Weight: 7.5 pounds
1552 pages of really boring stuff that will cure any insomniacs! (Queen take note!)
Ridley's Believe It or Not Trivia MCQ,
Which of the following is true?
1) One of these books was used as a murder weapon in a homicide. (Yes they are that heavy!)
2) A medical student once had to rip off a page from one of these textbooks because he tua lao sai and there were no toilet paper in the cubicle. (high quality paper ok!)
3) A student used one of these books as a pillow the night before exams and miraculously remembered every single word from the book the next day. (He still failed as he slept on Robbins but was going for his Surgical paper!)
4) If you drop all 3 books from the tower of Pisa at the same time, they will just land on your feet and fracture your toes. (Not asking you to throw killer litter lah, bodoh!)
5) Some medical students have actually read all 3 books cover to cover!
Once in a while, your seniors will be telling you that you must get the thickest and most powderful book in the universe. Don't believe them. They are evil salesman trying to sell you their unwanted textbooks.
I've also been told that "you are only as good a doctor as the book you read." I totally agree...... just that what is the likelihood that you are going to read a 2000-page textbk that is so heavy it causes muscle cramps worse than rifle-over-head???!!!
Finally, you end up buying those little handbooks....the "Babies" hoping that there is enough information in it to help you pass. (If you haven't figured it out, the big ones are called "Papas". NO! NOT Daddies! That sounds really kinky!)
Here are some of those
Harrison's Principles of Internal MedicineDimensions: 11.1 x 8.8 x 3.1 inches
Weight: 8.9 pounds
2629 pages!!! I never even bought this book coz it was too big to carry home in a bus! (Poor medical student was I.....)
Bailey & Love's Short Practice of SurgeryDimensions: 11.0 x 9.0 x 2.8 inches
Weight: 10.2 pounds
1348 pages!!!! (and its a short practice???.... DOH!)
Robbins Pathologic Basis of DiseaseDimensions: 11.3 x 8.7 x 2.4 inches
Weight: 7.5 pounds
1552 pages of really boring stuff that will cure any insomniacs! (Queen take note!)
Ridley's Believe It or Not Trivia MCQ,
Which of the following is true?
1) One of these books was used as a murder weapon in a homicide. (Yes they are that heavy!)
2) A medical student once had to rip off a page from one of these textbooks because he tua lao sai and there were no toilet paper in the cubicle. (high quality paper ok!)
3) A student used one of these books as a pillow the night before exams and miraculously remembered every single word from the book the next day. (He still failed as he slept on Robbins but was going for his Surgical paper!)
4) If you drop all 3 books from the tower of Pisa at the same time, they will just land on your feet and fracture your toes. (Not asking you to throw killer litter lah, bodoh!)
5) Some medical students have actually read all 3 books cover to cover!
Once in a while, your seniors will be telling you that you must get the thickest and most powderful book in the universe. Don't believe them. They are evil salesman trying to sell you their unwanted textbooks.
I've also been told that "you are only as good a doctor as the book you read." I totally agree...... just that what is the likelihood that you are going to read a 2000-page textbk that is so heavy it causes muscle cramps worse than rifle-over-head???!!!
Sunday, October 30, 2005
No Pride, Just Prejudice
I don’t know if you have this experience but when you tell people that you are a doctor, unconsciously their eyes become wide open. In different scenarios this can mean different things.
1) During a date with a pretty girl:
Don’t ask me how you landed yourself in a hot date without telling her you are a doctor in the first place. Assuming that you went for blind date courtesy of SDU and you were fortunate enough not to be on call, your date was probably thinking, “Wah loctor! Good catch wor!”
2) During a meet-the-parents session:
Again assuming that you had a good posting and had time to actually go pak tor (in Kent Ridge Park), things went your way (or actually her way) and you got to meet her parents. You tell your mother-in-law to be that you are a doctor and she must be thinking, “Way to go ah girl! You made it liao!” At least you would be treated better than Gaylord M. Focker in my favourite movie, Meet the Parents.
3) During your wedding dinner:
Your head of department was manic and granted you marriage leave. You had no other valid reasons to siam and there you were in your tuxedo Her relatives find out that you are a doctor and they would be cursing under their breaths, “I know I give less ang bao!”
4) When you see a financial planner:
Your mother-in-law’s cousin’s son happened to have just graduated as a financial planner. You had no choice but to entertain him or face terrible backlash. Amidst all the financial jargons he was dishing out to confuse you, you swore you saw those dollar signs flashing in his eyes when he found out you are a doctor. “Commission lai liao!”
5) You went to the wet market to buy fish (DHA good for baby mah) because your wife was too gravid to do so:
You told the fishmonger casually you were a doctor and he recommended some special kelong fish for you at a very special price. Just that there are no kelongs in Singapore anymore and you found out later the price was indeed quite special.
Actually doctors are just like everyone else except that we work long hours, can probably hold our bladder longer (but we do get renal calculi), can remain calm and composed in the face of verbal abuse (sometimes by patients, mostly by our professors) and we call all this professionalism.
1) During a date with a pretty girl:
Don’t ask me how you landed yourself in a hot date without telling her you are a doctor in the first place. Assuming that you went for blind date courtesy of SDU and you were fortunate enough not to be on call, your date was probably thinking, “Wah loctor! Good catch wor!”
2) During a meet-the-parents session:
Again assuming that you had a good posting and had time to actually go pak tor (in Kent Ridge Park), things went your way (or actually her way) and you got to meet her parents. You tell your mother-in-law to be that you are a doctor and she must be thinking, “Way to go ah girl! You made it liao!” At least you would be treated better than Gaylord M. Focker in my favourite movie, Meet the Parents.
3) During your wedding dinner:
Your head of department was manic and granted you marriage leave. You had no other valid reasons to siam and there you were in your tuxedo Her relatives find out that you are a doctor and they would be cursing under their breaths, “I know I give less ang bao!”
4) When you see a financial planner:
Your mother-in-law’s cousin’s son happened to have just graduated as a financial planner. You had no choice but to entertain him or face terrible backlash. Amidst all the financial jargons he was dishing out to confuse you, you swore you saw those dollar signs flashing in his eyes when he found out you are a doctor. “Commission lai liao!”
5) You went to the wet market to buy fish (DHA good for baby mah) because your wife was too gravid to do so:
You told the fishmonger casually you were a doctor and he recommended some special kelong fish for you at a very special price. Just that there are no kelongs in Singapore anymore and you found out later the price was indeed quite special.
Actually doctors are just like everyone else except that we work long hours, can probably hold our bladder longer (but we do get renal calculi), can remain calm and composed in the face of verbal abuse (sometimes by patients, mostly by our professors) and we call all this professionalism.
Friday, October 28, 2005
Orchid
Mr Tan sat on his sofa. His left hand gently stroking the worn-out fabric. He looked to his right, to the empty seat beside him. He tried to smile. Just three weeks ago, his wife was sitting there, watching their favourite Teochew Opera on television. He remembered reminiscing with his wife about how they watched the same story when they were dating. During those days, he would hold her hand during the opera. Her small white handkerchief with tiny flowers sequinned at one corner covered their hands. They did not want any relatives to see this public display of affection, which at their time, was still frowned upon.
Tears started to well up inside his eyes and slowly rolled down the side of his wrinkled face. He remembered his wife smiling at him when he tried to sing some of the lines from the opera. He remembered choking and coughing during one of the higher notes, and his wife had to alternate between patting and stroking his back. He thought he could still feel his wife’s hand between his shoulder blades.
Mr Tan looked away from the empty seat. Through his eyes, which were blurred with tears, Mr Tan saw his wife everywhere. He saw her standing at the stove, scooping out a bowl of hot porridge for him. He used to love porridge with sweet potato. Even though this was a simple dish, he loved it. Especially the way she prepared it. He saw her sitting beside the window, in her favourite chair, patching up some holes in his trousers. Her glasses that she only wore during her sewing work were still there on top of the cabinet. He still cleaned the glasses for her each day since three weeks ago. He saw her standing outside the flat, watering the potted plants. He saw her proudly telling him how the orchids had bloomed.
Mr Tan felt lost. Ever since the day he saw her leaving the home on a trolley accompanied by paramedics, he felt lost. As he sat in the ambulance looking at the wife gasping, her face covered by a oxygen mask, he felt lost. As he saw doctors and nurses pulling the curtain around the wife’s bed, he felt lost.
Sitting on the sofa, Mr Tan thought he heard the wife call his name. The seat beside him was still empty. He suddenly felt a sense of calmness and serenity. Drying the tears from his face with a shirtsleeve, he closed his eyes and laid his head back onto the sofa. He would see her soon.
This is dedicated to you. You know who you are.
Tears started to well up inside his eyes and slowly rolled down the side of his wrinkled face. He remembered his wife smiling at him when he tried to sing some of the lines from the opera. He remembered choking and coughing during one of the higher notes, and his wife had to alternate between patting and stroking his back. He thought he could still feel his wife’s hand between his shoulder blades.
Mr Tan looked away from the empty seat. Through his eyes, which were blurred with tears, Mr Tan saw his wife everywhere. He saw her standing at the stove, scooping out a bowl of hot porridge for him. He used to love porridge with sweet potato. Even though this was a simple dish, he loved it. Especially the way she prepared it. He saw her sitting beside the window, in her favourite chair, patching up some holes in his trousers. Her glasses that she only wore during her sewing work were still there on top of the cabinet. He still cleaned the glasses for her each day since three weeks ago. He saw her standing outside the flat, watering the potted plants. He saw her proudly telling him how the orchids had bloomed.
Mr Tan felt lost. Ever since the day he saw her leaving the home on a trolley accompanied by paramedics, he felt lost. As he sat in the ambulance looking at the wife gasping, her face covered by a oxygen mask, he felt lost. As he saw doctors and nurses pulling the curtain around the wife’s bed, he felt lost.
Sitting on the sofa, Mr Tan thought he heard the wife call his name. The seat beside him was still empty. He suddenly felt a sense of calmness and serenity. Drying the tears from his face with a shirtsleeve, he closed his eyes and laid his head back onto the sofa. He would see her soon.
This is dedicated to you. You know who you are.
You can't win......
One serious problem I have is that this site is undisclaimerable. You guys ever pay attention to my disclaimers or not???
Being the suspicious and paranoid person that I am, Dr Og goes around peeking at sites that link me. Most of sites gave really positive reviews so much so it brings tears to my eyes (no lah, just exaggerating as usual). But there are inaccuracies that can kill man!
Someone commented that I am "from SGH" and that my accounts are "authentic". Then got someone link me as "Dr ONG" (its Dr Og can?). Worse of all, a medical student called me "infamous".
Can you imagine? A witch hunt for Dr Ong from SGH infamous for blogging authentic accounts of patients. Wah die man! Sorry ah, all the Dr Ongs out there.
To further prove the point that disclaimers fall to blind eyes, people have been sending me comments to correct grammar, spellings and stuff. I know my england really cannot make it. But then again, I'm not an English teacher. Cut me some slack can or not?
Last thing. Of course we are (very)happy and most flattered that people read our posts. But the boundaries are now clear. So we chose to stay within the boundaries. Why? Becoz people don't read disclaimers and will assume that the posts are authentic and then go after the ass of some innocent Dr Ong.
So boh bian loh. No more posts related to work. This site has contracted a terminal illness. Let it die peacefully. Can?
Being the suspicious and paranoid person that I am, Dr Og goes around peeking at sites that link me. Most of sites gave really positive reviews so much so it brings tears to my eyes (no lah, just exaggerating as usual). But there are inaccuracies that can kill man!
Someone commented that I am "from SGH" and that my accounts are "authentic". Then got someone link me as "Dr ONG" (its Dr Og can?). Worse of all, a medical student called me "infamous".
Can you imagine? A witch hunt for Dr Ong from SGH infamous for blogging authentic accounts of patients. Wah die man! Sorry ah, all the Dr Ongs out there.
To further prove the point that disclaimers fall to blind eyes, people have been sending me comments to correct grammar, spellings and stuff. I know my england really cannot make it. But then again, I'm not an English teacher. Cut me some slack can or not?
Last thing. Of course we are (very)happy and most flattered that people read our posts. But the boundaries are now clear. So we chose to stay within the boundaries. Why? Becoz people don't read disclaimers and will assume that the posts are authentic and then go after the ass of some innocent Dr Ong.
So boh bian loh. No more posts related to work. This site has contracted a terminal illness. Let it die peacefully. Can?
Thursday, October 27, 2005
小明的日记簿 Episode 2:
小明的日记簿 is an epic novel which depicts the ridiculous life of a medical student. The characters of this epic novel are fictional. Any similarities with person(s) dead or alive is purely due to your own imagination.
Mao Mao as he is affectionately known by his family was borned hairy. His mother suspected that all his body hair probably made up a substantial amount of his birth weight, a hefty 3.7kg, a big baby for those times. A strange phenomenon was to render Mao Mao hairless as he grew. He will later learn in medical school that the condition is called androgenetic alopecia or simply male pattern balding to the lay person.
At this point of time, Mao Mao was a young 19 year old and this dreaded condition had yet to afflict him. His crowning glory was still very much intact and gave him much needed confidence to chase girls. The same cannot be said of his new found friend from medicine.
Actually Mao Mao had not really decided if he considered Meng Kee his friend. As Meng Kee was just one name down the roster, Mao Mao ended up in the same group as him for almost everything.
Meng Kee was the typical on the wrong ball kind of person. At least as far as Mao Mao was concerned.
"Isn't it great?!!! Mao! We are in medicine! We are going to be doctors! I'm so excited"
On the contrary, Mao Mao had wished he did not go for the interview. After big mouth Aunty Lily told the whole clan he was accepted, his lao pek had brought him before the ancestral altar and made him swear he would go through the 5 year course. He suspected his father had connections with secret society, now he confirmed he is right.
"So you read any books yet? I finish reading Ganung liao. Damn cheem!" Meng Kee went on. Mao Mao had no idea what Ganung was.
"And you got your locker liao?" The good thing about Meng Kee was that he did looked out for Mao Mao.
"But the orientation also not over yet....." Mao Mao replied.
"You don't know lah, all the lockers near our lecture hall all taken liao, better go and get one quick!"
Indeed, Mao Mao went to the estate office and was allocated a locker far far away. He searched high and low before finally finding his locker at one far corner in the Science faculty. The locker was terribly rusted and there was a lock.
"Basket! Which turtle senior never remove his lock." He was already frustrated from getting such a lousy location. He went back to the estate office and a young punk was sent to bust the lock.
Mao Mao removed the busted lock and opened the locker. The interior was moist and algae was growing.
"Wah lau this type of locker, kennah sai." He was not going to use it.
Something else caught his eyes. There was a book inside. He took it out and flipped to the first page:
Mao Mao as he is affectionately known by his family was borned hairy. His mother suspected that all his body hair probably made up a substantial amount of his birth weight, a hefty 3.7kg, a big baby for those times. A strange phenomenon was to render Mao Mao hairless as he grew. He will later learn in medical school that the condition is called androgenetic alopecia or simply male pattern balding to the lay person.
At this point of time, Mao Mao was a young 19 year old and this dreaded condition had yet to afflict him. His crowning glory was still very much intact and gave him much needed confidence to chase girls. The same cannot be said of his new found friend from medicine.
Actually Mao Mao had not really decided if he considered Meng Kee his friend. As Meng Kee was just one name down the roster, Mao Mao ended up in the same group as him for almost everything.
Meng Kee was the typical on the wrong ball kind of person. At least as far as Mao Mao was concerned.
"Isn't it great?!!! Mao! We are in medicine! We are going to be doctors! I'm so excited"
On the contrary, Mao Mao had wished he did not go for the interview. After big mouth Aunty Lily told the whole clan he was accepted, his lao pek had brought him before the ancestral altar and made him swear he would go through the 5 year course. He suspected his father had connections with secret society, now he confirmed he is right.
"So you read any books yet? I finish reading Ganung liao. Damn cheem!" Meng Kee went on. Mao Mao had no idea what Ganung was.
"And you got your locker liao?" The good thing about Meng Kee was that he did looked out for Mao Mao.
"But the orientation also not over yet....." Mao Mao replied.
"You don't know lah, all the lockers near our lecture hall all taken liao, better go and get one quick!"
Indeed, Mao Mao went to the estate office and was allocated a locker far far away. He searched high and low before finally finding his locker at one far corner in the Science faculty. The locker was terribly rusted and there was a lock.
"Basket! Which turtle senior never remove his lock." He was already frustrated from getting such a lousy location. He went back to the estate office and a young punk was sent to bust the lock.
Mao Mao removed the busted lock and opened the locker. The interior was moist and algae was growing.
"Wah lau this type of locker, kennah sai." He was not going to use it.
Something else caught his eyes. There was a book inside. He took it out and flipped to the first page:
“这是小明的日记簿。生人勿进！”
Over the Rainbow
Somewhere over the rainbow
Way up high
There's a land that I heard of
Once in a lullaby
Somewhere over the rainbow
Skies are blue
And the dreams that you dare to dream
Really do come true
Some day I'll wish upon a star
And wake up where the clouds are far behind me
Where troubles melt like lemondrops
Away above the chimney tops
That's where you'll find me
Way up high
There's a land that I heard of
Once in a lullaby
Somewhere over the rainbow
Skies are blue
And the dreams that you dare to dream
Really do come true
Some day I'll wish upon a star
And wake up where the clouds are far behind me
Where troubles melt like lemondrops
Away above the chimney tops
That's where you'll find me
So who's the rainbow in your life?
Do you have one?
===================
I saw her again today.
I thought she glanced at me and smile.
I smiled back.
I hope she saw.
Do you have one?
===================
I saw her again today.
I thought she glanced at me and smile.
I smiled back.
I hope she saw.
The Boogie Man
Have you ever dreamt that,
you were chased
by a boogie man.
And you were running,
and running
and running
Down the staircase
which seemed
to be never-
ending
But if you had
stopped to take
a peek,
you would see
the same eyes,
the same ears,
the same nose,
the same mouth,
The same face.
The boogie man was you.
you were chased
by a boogie man.
And you were running,
and running
and running
Down the staircase
which seemed
to be never-
ending
But if you had
stopped to take
a peek,
you would see
the same eyes,
the same ears,
the same nose,
the same mouth,
The same face.
The boogie man was you.
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